When the wind blows, it can feel like your life is being ripped to shreds. It's not an easy thing to get through, but it's important to remember that there are others who have been where you are and made it out on the other side. You'll need support and resources in order to survive this journey, so let's talk about some of them together.
There is No Right or Wrong Way to Grieve
There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Grief is a process. You can't control how you feel and you can't force yourself to do something that you don't want to do, nor can you force yourself not to do something that you want to do. It's important to be gentle with yourself, especially when dealing with the death of someone close. Learning how to navigate through this process will help ease some of the pain in our lives as we learn how to live without our loved ones by our side.
Depression and Anxiety are Common
Depression and anxiety are common. It is normal to feel depressed or anxious.
Emotional support is important. It helps you get through the hard days and keep your spirits up, especially when you're going through a lot of changes in your life at once.
How do I find emotional support? You can ask a friend, family member or someone else who will listen when you need it. They can also help talk through things with you—or just be available to listen while you vent! Also consider joining an online community like Facebook groups where other caregivers share their experiences too!
Essential oils can support us during times of stress or illness because they have anti-inflammatory properties that can ease pain and stress on our bodies! Oil blends like Adaptiv (calming blend) and Console (comforting blend) can be part of a holistic approach to managing depression or anxiety associated with grief.
You can Experience Different Emotions Simultaneously
When people hear the word "emotions," they usually think of just one emotion at a time. This is because we have been taught to compartmentalize our feelings and emotions into neat little boxes labeled "good" or "bad." As humans, we are forced to deal with many different emotions simultaneously.
You may feel happy and sad at the same time. You can also experience anger while feeling guilty, hopeful while feeling hopeless, excited when you're depressed and vice versa. It's really hard for your brain to understand how two seemingly opposite feelings can co-exist within you at once, but it does happen all the time!
Your body is amazing at healing itself and responding to stressors by releasing chemicals that help us cope with difficult situations like cancer diagnosis and treatment or widowhood after losing someone close to us through death or divorce (or both!). Essential oils can be another tool in your toolkit when dealing with these simultaneous feelings so that you don't have an emotional breakdown because of them!
You Can Feel Anger Towards Your Loved One
At times, you may find yourself angry with your loved one. You might be angry at them for not fighting harder, or even anger that they are sick in the first place. Sometimes it is easier to take out our anger on them than ourselves or others. After all, what harm can come from being angry at someone who cannot answer back?
It's important to remember that it's okay to feel this way about your loved one and yourself, but there is no use in holding onto those feelings after they've passed through your system. Instead of dwelling on anger or frustration, focus on forgiveness. This can be done by adding Forgive essential oil blend into the diffuser or applying directly to the temples and wrists when needed.
Having a Loss of Self-Identity is Normal
You may experience a loss of self-identity. It may feel as if you have lost your identity, purpose or sense of self. You may even feel that you don't know who you are anymore. This is normal and should be expected with the changes in roles and responsibilities that come with caring for someone else until they pass away.
Essential oils can help with this situation by bringing back the positive aspects of who we are while also balancing out the negative ones so we can move forward in life without being held back by those feelings. One essential oil blend that is effective at helping people get through these hard times is called "Balance".This blend is made of Spruce, Ho Wood, Frankincense, Blue Tansy, and Blue Chamomile. It can be diffuser or applied to pulse points to remind you to find harmony and balance in both mind and body.
The Need for Attention Doesn't Mean You Are Selfish
You're a caregiver, and you're getting attention. You've been asked to speak at a conference. People are coming up to you at events and saying they admire your strength, that they are so sorry for your loss, that they can't imagine what you've been through. And it feels good! It really does; after all, no one wants their grief belittled or ignored. But the truth is this: Even though people may be telling you "I'm here for you," they aren't really there for anything but themselves—they just want to be able to feel like a Good Person without actually doing anything helpful or productive in any way whatsoever (and I don't blame them).
We humans are wired this way—we need others around us so we don't feel alone or insecure about ourselves; but our need for attention has nothing to do with other people's actual needs, which is why being able to express emotions is so important during the grieving process (as well as throughout life). Maybe it's not fair that caretakers always have the burden of taking their loss out on others instead of being able to keep it inside until they get some space from everyone else...but those are just some things about life we'll never fully understand (and mostly because no one taught us how!).
Practicing Self-Care is Important
Self-care is a very important part of the healing process for anyone who has been through a life-changing event like widowhood. It is not selfish to take care of yourself, because your loved one would want you to be happy and healthy after they are gone.
You can practice self-care in many ways: taking walks, diffusing or applying essential oils, meditating, cooking delicious meals, going on vacation with friends or family members, or even just taking time off work and sleeping in late! The key is that you are doing things that make YOU feel good!
Remembering Them is Something to Look Forward To
Remembering your loved one is a way to keep their memory alive and it can also help you heal. There are many ways that you can remember them—you can hold on to a piece of clothing, a photograph or even an item that held special meaning for them. You may feel closer to them when you remember the time together and this will help you feel less alone in your grief journey.
If there was anything that made them happy, do it or find something new that brings joy! Remembering what they liked and did will make them happy as well because they would have wanted you to be happy after they left us behind in order to live somewhere else. It's not easy but I'm sure if we all could see our loved ones again we would tell them how much we love [them].
Guilt Can Be Devastating
Guilt is a normal part of grief. It’s important to be aware of when you’re feeling guilty so that you can help yourself by asking yourself if you have done everything you could have done. If the answer is yes, then allow yourself to let go of that guilt; if it was not in your power to change what happened or make it different, then there is nothing more for which to feel guilty. You can help release guilt by using peppermint oil over your heart chakra and asking that any negative energy that leads to feelings of guilt be removed from your being.
You Are Not Alone
You are not alone. There is no shame in needing help during this difficult time, and there are a number of ways you can get it.
Talk to your children - They may be worried about you and feel helpless as well. Let them know what they can do for you and go from there.
Seek professional help - It's okay to talk about your feelings with someone who won't judge or tell you what to do but will simply listen. A counselor or therapist can serve this function very effectively; just remember that counseling isn't for everyone, so if it doesn't seem right for you then don't force yourself into it! If finding a therapist isn't an option financially or otherwise then try reaching out on Facebook to groups like " " where people share their experiences with grief while offering support to others going through similar struggles; I personally find this community incredibly comforting when I'm feeling down because many times there will be someone else experiencing similar thoughts/feelings at that moment too so talking together helps us both feel less alone in our own headspace!
Find a friend who has experienced something similar - This could mean talking directly with someone who has lost their spouse recently but chances are good that person won't have many close friends left since they were likely grieving too at the time which means now might be their chance! You could also look around Facebook groups/pages specifically tailored toward widows/widowers/widowed spouses (I recommend searching keywords such as "widow support group" on Google).
We've all heard the phrase, "the wind blows where it will." It's a metaphor for the unpredictability of life. We can't control everything that happens to us and we shouldn't expect to be able to do so.